5 Types of Mother Wounds & How to Heal
- Lalita

- Jun 14, 2023
- 2 min read
Updated: Dec 16, 2025

Sending lots of love to all those who are navigating healing in a relationship with their mothers as well to those who are making space to heal emotionally and advance spiritually whilst being a mother themselves.
You’re my hero!
As empaths, we never seek to blame or fault-fine, but instead focus on how we can lift ourselves from the challenges before us and, in doing so, lift the hearts and minds of our lineage. This is always the goal!
And by bringing awareness to the different ways emotional wounds can manifest, it allows us to understand our relationship with ourselves because our parents' behaviours dictate and determine how we See ourselves, How we treat ourselves, Our feelings and needs And how we talk to ourselves.
We become mothers in relation to ourselves through this learned behaviour.
Below are the 5 different types of mother wounds
🔸Narcissistic or Narcissistic traits - Emotional manipulation, criticising, guilting, shaming, nitpicking, controlling, physical, mental and emotional abuse.
🔸Quiet - Often there’s birth trauma, postnatal depression, something that created distance in the beginning, 0-8, overall lack of warmth or attunement emotionally.
🔸Chaotic - Lack of boundaries, takes on way too much, state of anxiety or chaos, always busy, stressful environment and therefore not available emotionally.
🔸Parentification - Over-reliance on the child to meet the mother's emotional needs - codependent, child is the go-between and counsellor. Shares too much, forcing the child to grow up quickly, creates the rescuer archetype
🔸Angry - Internal dis-regulation, anger issues that are vented onto the child, not available to be kind and caring, often cruel and harsh with words.
What is the one that stood out for you’re the most as a recipient? Not as a mother yourself but as a child growing up with your mother or mother figure. There’s usually one that’s most prominent and then secondary.
After you’ve chosen, ask yourself the following questions
🔹How do I show up for myself when I’m in pain? 🔹How do I show up for myself when I make a mistake? (if you got yelled at, you will likely yell at yourself.) 🔹How do you treat yourself daily? (What’s the baseline? Do you make space for your inner world?) 🔹How do you give yourself care, nurture - self-care? (If your relationship was mostly about your mother, you likely won’t know how to do this.) codependent 🔹How do you show up for others?
Now pick one that feels most out of alignment for you and find a strategy to show up for yourself in a healthy way. The key here is awareness and even if you just focus on being more aware of what happens when you make a mistake, are in pain..etc! This is progress!
If you'd like more support and guidance on how to heal your emotional world, check out the resources below:
Access the detailed Boundary Workbook below
Giving you specific tools and deep insight to heal and open your energy body. In loving service,
Lalita




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